Wednesday, September 10, 2008

The Fable of the Gnome Rogue

The Tauren Hunter was merrily bounding into the Silverwing base in Warsong Gulch; she had been enjoying these player-verses-player excursions lately and was rather fond of her 25,000 honor that she had stockpiled for when she would hit 70 in a couple more levels and would need a nice set of war gear to go with her set of standard adventuring gear. She made it to the roof of the enemy building when suddenly she was jumped upon! By a very persistent gnome rogue.

Now, the tauren knew that many of her fellow hunters dislike the rogue because they are very good at taking away that which hunters prize most: space. However, she has an odd knack for managing to catch rogues before they catch her, and even when they do catch her first she has a knack for wriggling her way out of their grasp, so at first she wasn't afraid. She directed her trusty red lynx to Intimidate the rogue, during which time she laid down an Immolation Trap and got a little bit of range and then hit him with a Serpent Sting.

He was soon on top of her again though, and sadly his first initial strikes had taken a critical toll so she was down on her luck right from the start. Still, they tussled for a bit, before the hunter's health ran low and she collapsed to the ground.

She did not release her spirit though, for the rogue was himself weak, and he was still burning from the Immolation Trap and still feeling the ache of the Serpent Sting...

He saw her watching him, so he targeted her and /laughed.

Then, smugly, he started to bandage himself.

Serpent Sting removed the bandage effect.

The gnome's eyes widened. They say in this world of pixels and polygons, facial expressions cannot change. I swear to the Earthmother, though, that his eyes widened as he came to a sudden realization.

The last tick of the Serpent Sting went off and he fell to the floor.

They lay there for a few seconds, simply targeting each other. Then, when the tauren hunter was sure her message had clearly been sent across, she calmly released to the graveyard.

The moral of the story, oh best beloved...

...is do not /laugh at a hunter, for they have a disturbing tendency to have the last /laugh. Or the last /giggle, anyways.

10 comments:

MW said...

/cheer Lunapike

Neggles said...

Right now, Pike, I love you beyond words :D

Ratshag said...

/hate DoTs

Armond said...

Have to agree with Ratshag on this one.

Also, had it been me, I probably would have removed your insignia to save myself the shame of the bandage-fail.

Steve said...

More DoTs! More DoTs!

Hit it like you mean it!

Yea, well anyways, I'm kinda sad for him that he died to a Serpent Sting, musta been a really close fight.

Props to him though for not taking your insignia as armond mentioned. I think that's pretty honorable on his part, even if he was taunting you a little.

Rilgon Arcsinh said...

You know, as much as I can't stand PVP, you're such an eloquent writer that I can't find anything to poke or prod at.

Keep doing what you do, Pike, because you do it so deliciously well. :)

Single White Alt said...

Awesome story! /cheer!

Morane said...

I'm with Ratshag and Armond. One of the first times I ran a BG the other side had a twinked gnome warlock.

When he hit me with his DOTs I was doomed. Even if I started with full health, bandaged, chugged a potion and ate I still died.

Pike said...

Thank you all for the compliments <3

Ian said...

that. was. EPIC.